Sabbath Rest: Take Time to Slow Down and Rest

Q. Life is too busy. We are constantly under time pressure to get chores done, go some where, and do something.  I yearn for time alone, time to unwind and time to enjoy my family. We seem to only achieve rest and relief while on vacation. How can we lessen our busyness and stress? Can New Year Resolutions help along this line?  

A. “I’m too busy” seems to be a universal refrain in today’s world. We’re so overwhelmed by the demands and activities of each day that life doesn’t feel easy, pleasant or peaceful. We long to be calm and serene like Mary but we’re more like busy Martha. Some people even take pride in busyness, perhaps feeling important because of it. Our society pushes and pressures us in this direction and has convinced us that “down time” is wasted. But is it?

If we are spending our days in frantic effort with no time for rest, joy, serenity, or even fun - what are our priorities?  Have we lost sight of what we want in life? Have we lost sight of what God wants for us in life, as well? New Year Resolutions or plans along this line are in order.

Wayne Muller, in his book Sabbath: Remembering the Sacred Rhythm of Rest and Delight, suggests we have forgotten the Sabbath. The Hebrew word for Sabbath is “Shabbat” and means to stop, to rest. Most faiths prescribe some period of time each week dedicated to worship, singing, giving thanks, sharing meals and resting. It’s a time for being nurtured and renewed. It’s a time to let go of work and responsibilities. 

Mueller suggests that “rest is not just a psychological convenience; it is a spiritual and biological necessity.” If we’re sleep deprived and exhausted we’re not effective in any area of our life. Rest enables us to meet the demands of life with joy and ease and this improves our effectiveness in our work as well as in our relationships.

We don’t want to return to the legalistic or routine keeping of the Sabbath as our parents or grandparents observed it, but we can make the decision to find time for rest. Our Sabbath rest can be an hour, an afternoon or a Holy day. Many other activities will tempt you from your plan. Modern life seduces us away from Sabbath rest if we let it.

Here are some ways to create Sabbath rest.

1. Reevaluate your values and goals. Talk over with your family how you will make time for Sabbath rest. List the values you follow and the ones you would like to follow. Share these with your family. Change your activity schedule based on these values.

2. Give thanks before meals. This can be a meaningful time of connection for the whole family. You can also give thanks when you first wake up in the morning before you even get out of bed and at night before you fall asleep. Prayer and thanksgiving are restful activities that remind us of our blessings and of a power greater than us.

3. Pause during the day, take three deep breaths and pray or meditate. Tie this to some regular activity such as every time you stand up or sit down.

4. Pamper yourself. Take a nap or a leisurely bath. Both are good for your health. You don’t have to feel guilty about relaxing. 

5. Turn off the TV and the telephone during dinner. Create a regular period of uninterrupted time with your family and with yourself.

6. Take time for worship on a regular basis. It will restore your soul.

One of my favorite hymns says: “There is a place of quiet rest, near to the heart of God, a place where sin cannot molest, near to the heart of God.“ When we draw near to God he draws near to us.

“Come to me all you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle, and you will find rest for your souls.” Matthew 11:28-29 NLT

Blessings, Dottie

LEARNING TO RELAX

Q. I have high blood pressure and a nervous stomach. My doctor says it will help both conditions if I learn to relax. This amazes me. I thought both of these conditions were due to physical causes. How can I learn to relax when I’ve always been a tense person?

A. Our minds and bodies work together. Many physical symptoms and nervous symptoms are related to emotional stress. Someone has said, “We call it serenity when the mind is free of tension; we call it relaxation when the body is. They are really one and the same.” Relaxation is a powerful healing tool. There is research evidence that relaxation can lessen the effects of many physical symptoms as well as alleviating many psychological conditions. Persons with stress-related high blood pressure may find that regular relaxation will lower their blood pressure enough to decrease or even to eliminate the need for medication.

          

Relaxation has been shown to reduce many of our negative emotions - anger, anxiety, fear and depression. Many of these negative emotions are connected with heart disease. One study of men who took an afternoon nap showed that they had 30% to 50% less risk of heart attack. In another study individuals who were taught relaxation techniques were able to fall asleep four times faster than they were previously. Relaxation can even boost the functioning of our immune system. 

          

Relaxation will not cure everything but it is an amazingly effective way to enhance our quality of life.  Relaxation is almost discouraged by our culture. Our life styles are rushed and our schedules are crammed. Many of us don’t know how to relax. Relaxation can help all of us. Living without a daily time to relax is similar to driving your car with the brakes on all the time.  

          

When we are under stress our bodies and minds are geared for action. Our blood pressure and heart rate increases, our respiration increases, our muscles tense, the adrenaline flows. When we relax our heart rate and blood pressure decrease, our respiration decreases, our muscles relax, we feel calm.      

          

To learn how to relax your body and mind, set aside ten to twenty minutes twice a day for relaxation, meditation or prayer. Taking just these brief periods out of your busy day will improve your physical, emotional and spiritual health.

          

There are two basic steps to relaxation. 

1.  Repeat a word, prayer, or phrase.  Say this over and over.

2.  Passively ignore thoughts that come to your mind and return to repeating the word, prayer or phrase. 

Herbert Benson, M.D., who defined bodily calm as “the relaxation response” and discovered the steps which elicit it, has more recently discovered that faith is a helpful factor in learning to relax. Dr. Benson teaches his patients to pick a focus word or short phrase to say repetitively as described above. He was surprised that most of his patients chose prayer to focus their thoughts. He also found that when people chose a word or phrase that sprang from their deep beliefs and convictions they were more likely to continue the relaxation. In other words, if you use a prayer or phrase with deep meaning to you you will be more consistent in setting aside the time for doing this.

          

A faith focus also enabled Dr. Benson’s patients to elicit positive memories which aided their health.  Because of their faith they visualized wellness which facilitated their recovery. Their belief also helped them disconnect from unhealthy worries or negative thinking. Dr. Benson reluctantly began to explore the “faith factor” and he came to believe that we are biologically wired for faith. To learn more about this read Timeless Healing, The Power and Biology of Belief  by Herbert Benson, M.D.

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” Matthew 11:28

Blessings, Dottie

TAKE TIME TO SLOW DOWN AND REST

Q. Life is too busy. We are constantly under time pressure to get chores done, go some where, and do something.  I yearn for time alone, time to unwind and time to enjoy my family. We seem to only achieve rest and relief while on vacation. How can we lessen our busyness and stress?    

VACATION: A TIME FOR REST, RELAXATION AND RETREAT

Q. I’m loaded with responsibility at work. I set aside several days for a family vacation every year but I can't forget the work I’ve left behind and enjoy travel with my family. My wife would like us to take longer vacations. She says I don’t know how to really relax and I guess she’s right. What can I do to enjoy family vacations and really relax during the time off?

A. Vacation should be a time to get away from the stresses and pressures of daily living; a time for rest, relaxation and retreat. Rest rejuvenates us physically. Relaxation helps us slow down our mental “wheel spinning” and gain calmness of mind. Retreat gives us time to go within our souls and discover who we are apart from our responsibilities and our roles. We need all three.

To accomplish your goal of having a relaxing vacation, do the following:

1. Allow extra time. Allow more time than you think you will need all along the way. If you rush your wife and children to get through each day’s activities, none of you will be relaxed.

2. Don’t try to accomplish too much in one day. Everyone will be more relaxed and enjoy the trip more if you only travel 350 miles a day or if you only plan one major activity a day rather then three.  Wasting time is one of the purposes of vacations. Expect to waste time. Relish this - if you can. 

3. Build enthusiasm and excitement into the trip. Listen to the needs and wishes of other family members as well as your own. Include everyone in the plans. When possible choose activities that everyone enjoys. 

4. Be flexible. Though it helps to have some plans in place, too much planning leaves no room for spontaneity. You may discover activities at your destination that you were unaware of previously. Or you may have a delay or change of plans for a variety of reasons. Cultivate a calm, relaxed attitude. You can do this knowing that the main purpose of this trip is to relax and enjoy yourselves.

 

5. Expect some frustrations. There will be rain, road construction, bee stings, sun burn, tearful children and so forth.  

6. Deal with difficulties in a positive way. Show love and respect to each member of your family especially in the middle of a conflict or crisis. 

7. Use the vacation to get to know your wife and children better. Be a good listener; be interested in what they have to say. Play games with the children, read to them. Do things with them you normally don’t have time to do.

8. Recognize the great value of family togetherness. Shared experiences provide memories that will last a life time. Children remember the times their families did things together. It strengthens your ties to each other.

9. Learn to relax every weekend and you will enjoy next year’s vacation even more. Time doing nothing is essential to good health. Even ten minutes a day will help. Time relaxing with family throughout the year is essential to a healthy family life.

“Anyone who enters God’s rest also rests from his own work, just as God did from his.” Hebrews 4:10

Blessings, Dottie

The Healing Power of Relaxation

Another key that helps in times of crisis is the healing power of relaxation. Research shows relaxation can lessen the effects of many physical symptoms and it can reduce many of our negative emotions - anger, anxiety, fear and depression. One study of men who took an afternoon nap showed that they had 30% to 50% less risk of heart attack.  

In another study individuals who were taught relaxation techniques were able to fall asleep four times faster than they were previously. Relaxation can lessen pain during medical and dental procedures and during surgery. Relaxation can lessen nausea and vomiting connected with chemotherapy, and can reduce the length and pain of childbirth. Relaxation can even boost the functioning of our immune system.

Relaxation is almost discouraged by the culture. Our life styles are rushed and our commitments are many. When we have “free” time we look for a chore to do or we flip on the TV, the computer or reach for the telephone. Many of us don’t know how to relax. We can learn to relax by doing it.

Begin by setting aside 20 minutes each day. Use your imagination to keep your mind off your pain and to help you relax. Visualize a peaceful scene. See yourself in this scene and use all your senses to notice specific details such as a soft breeze, a butterfly, puffy white clouds. Concentrate on deep breathing and letting go. Let this special time be a gift to you. There is no right or wrong way to relax. Experiment and notice what helps your body and mind let go. Be patient with yourself and with the process of learning to relax. To learn more about relaxation read: The Relaxation Response by Herbert Benson, M.D

“Be still and know that I am God.” Psalms 46:10

Blessings, Dottie