Monday, February 27, 2017

Valuing Ash Wednesday

Ash Wednesday is on March first this year. This is a special day celebrated in many Christian churches. Ash Wednesday is the first day of Lent, the beginning of the 40 weekdays before Easter. Lent is observed in many Christian churches as a period of prayer, confession, repentance, fasting, and self-denial. It echoes the 40 days Jesus spent fasting and overcoming temptation in the wilderness. It also assists Christians in focusing on Jesus resolute journey leading to his crucifixion and resurrection. We learn to identify with his unwavering obedience. We recognize the price he paid for us.

Our faith journey, described in Changing Churches, began in a United Methodist Church – a church that observes Ash Wednesday. Throughout our years there, Ash Wednesday marked the beginning of a solemn and holy time of reflection. While searching for a church in 2008 we attended an Ash Wednesday service at another Methodist Church. I noted in my journal:
         
We sang six verses of “Just As I Am” and  “There is a Fountain Filled with Blood.”  The hymns, responsive readings, confession, and pastor’s message, touched and filled us. We received ashes in the shape of the cross on our foreheads and took Communion—opening and recommitting ourselves to Him. What a sacred event!

Prayer Journaling
In 2004 the teacher of my ladies Bible class mentioned journaling Psalm 51 about David’s sin, one phrase at a time, for the forty days of Lent. This proved to be a sobering but valuable exercise. In order to build up the church, Christians must change and grow. We must face our own sin and repent.

Understanding the Church Calendar
For those not in a liturgical church, Mark Galli’s explanation from his book Beyond Smells and Bells, may help you appreciate the emphasis on the church calendar. He writes:
The church calendar aims at nothing less than to change the way we experience time and perceive reality. . . . Advent signals the new year. For the church, the annual rhythm is not winter, spring, summer and fall, but Advent, Christmas, Epiphany, Lent, Easter and Pentecost. . . . The church calendar is not about the cycle of life – school or sports or harvest time – but about the movement of history toward a glorious goal. We celebrate the past events of history not merely to remember them but note how they infuse the present with meaning and power, and point us to our future hope.
Let this be a Holy season for all Christians to ponder and pray and deepen our faith.

Blessings, Dottie


Wednesday, February 22, 2017

THREE BOOKS ON HEALTH

Here are three book reviews I wrote on books about health issues. The first book will tell you how to get younger by exercising and it may even motivate you to do so! The second book will help you learn to overcome depression, even bipolar – written by a man who was diagnosed with this. The third book will inform you about life threatening medical issues and gives valuable information

Younger Next Year: Live Strong, Fit, and Sexy – Until You’re 80 and Beyond
 by Chris Crowley & Henry S. Lodge

This book is written by a doctor and one of his patients. They alternate chapters in describing what they have learned/believe about being as healthy as possible. The main message of this book is important- aging can be reversed and delayed by exercise. This message is repeated over and over and many great ideas are presented as to how to do this, how to work exercise into your life and how to make it a habit. I learned it is important to vary the exercise, to do weight lifting as well as walking or running and that you gain more strength and benefit when you push yourself beyond your limits.

The book is very repetitive and there are many slap stick comments and ski trip stories from Crowley that may appeal to some guys but not to many women or non skiers. I also thought the mention of evolution in many of the scientific descriptions is irrelevant.

The research evidence from Lodge gave convincing proof that exercise is key to good health. For example, he tells of sedentary 70 year old men who doubled their leg strength in three months. He also says that arthritis is an inflammatory disease of sedentary societies.

Younger Next Year also includes chapters on nutrition, emotions and connecting with others. Each of these topics greatly impacts our health especially as we age. A final chapter on sex reassures readers that this can continue into old age. The book hints at the importance of “spirituality” but says it’s not within the scope of the book. Yet they use Alcoholics Anonymous as an example of the benefits of connecting. The reason AA works is the “spiritual” path the 12 Steps require. 

I’ve been a regular exerciser for decades and I am a senior citizen. I added weight lifting four years ago. I can attest to the fact that this helps. My balance is better as well as my energy and strength. As a result of reading the book I’m jacking up my workouts so I’ll be even younger next year!

Overcoming Depression
And Manic Depression: A Whole Person Approach

By Paul Wider

Message from the author: “My heart goes out deeply to those who suffer from depression and bipolar. There is hope. It is possible to regain control of your life. I invite you to learn to master your moods using the multifaceted approach contained in this book. I wish you peace and wellness.”

Overcoming Depression is an unusual book chock full of information in a easy to read style with illustrations and steps to take for anyone who is depressed from one who has been through it. Wider was diagnosed with bipolar but refused to accept the diagnosis. He went on a quest to learn to manage his moods. The book has chapters on symptoms, causes, tools, needs, diet, faith and more. The author has used many avenues to help himself and after trial and error has many good answers.

As a retired clinical social worker and advocate for healthy life styles I’m pleased to know depression and bipolar can be successfully approached in holistic ways in cooperation with medical doctors. Mr. Wider’s book is a Godsend for those who read it and decide to try the various approaches to master their moods.

The Day I Died by Steve Sjogren

I reread The Day I Died after telling a friend about this book. She asked me if we had a Living Will and specifically wondered about water being withheld – an item on the usual Living Will. In the book Sjogren says that Terry Schiavo “died a slow and painful death due to dehydration.” He also tells of his own medical trials and says “of all the pain I experienced in life nothing comes close to the pain of being dry in the mouth for 7 to 10 days.” Sjogren describes his near death experiences of God’s reassurance and offers valuable thoughts about medical care and especially end of life care – and much more.

Steve Sjogren, former pastor of the Vineyard Community Church in Cincinnati tells a gripping true story of a simple surgery gone awry. He “died” twice during this and lives today because his wife didn’t listen to the claims that he had lost brain capacity while in a coma. She refused to pull the plug. His church and thousands of people across the country prayed for him and the prayers plus a new doctor and hospital pulled him back from the brink of death.

Much of the book describes the lessons Sjogren learned as a result of having to slow down. These are valuable lessons for all of us. His positive suggestions for what to say when visiting a dying friend are valuable. His life long daily practice of journaling and setting goals fascinated me also. This is an intriguing and valuable book.

Blessings, Dottie

“Praise the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits – who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases.” Psalm 103:2-3




Wednesday, February 15, 2017

FINDING THE SOLUTION IN CONFLICT RE”SOLUTION”

Q.  My husband and I were both married before and we were both in very difficult marriages with a great deal of arguing and fighting. We want to be sure we don’t repeat that pattern again. We’ve just been married a few months and so far we’ve gotten along well. What can we do to avoid conflict in this marriage?

A. It is impossible to avoid conflict in a close relationship. However, you can learn to handle conflict so that it helps the relationship rather than hurting it. Avoiding conflict and keeping the peace at all costs doesn’t work. When we avoid conflict, issues are decided by not being decided. Avoidance of conflict also can cause hidden resentment if either person feels they’re giving in or aren’t being heard. 
         
Guide Lines
One tool that often helps couples resolve differences is to agree to ground rules in the way issues are discussed. The following guide lines will help.
         
1. Stick to one issue. If you’re upset about many issues, make a list of them and discuss them one at a time. Start with just one and stick to that issue.
         
2. Use “I statements” and good listening skills to understand each other’s point of view on the issue. For example, “I would like you to…” rather than “You never…” or “You always…”
         
3. Define the problem. For example, you may feel rejected because your husband is watching TV during much of his free time. He may view your comments about this as nagging and feel you don’t understand his need to relax after a hard day at work. To define the problem think about what it is you want from each other. Perhaps you need his undivided attention for a half hour each evening. Perhaps he needs time to unwind watching TV. Once the problem is defined it’s easier to go on to the solutions.
         
4. List all the possible solutions without censoring any. Use your creativity and imagination to come up with many solutions. We often see only two solutions - mine and yours. There are many solutions to most every problem.
         
5. Look at all the solutions and think about the pros and cons of each one. Is there one that will meet the needs of both of you - at least partially? 
         
The above guide lines take time, persistence and practice so don’t give up. 

Settling Decisions
Communication is helped also by knowing there are several ways decisions can be settled: by consensus, compromise, agree to disagree, and by policies. 

1. Consensus or agreement may be reached. Some decisions can be made by consensus after there is open communication. This may happen as a result of one partner becoming convinced the other one has a good idea. Agreement can also come about when a couple arrive at a new choice that both find pleasing.
         
2. Compromise may be reached. Compromise involves each partner giving a little to meet the needs of the other and each partner getting part of what they want.

3. You may agree to disagree. Some issues do not require agreement because they’re matters of personal preference. Couples may disagree about politics, for example.  Couples may enjoy debating these differences but it’s not necessary for agreement to be reached. We don’t have to think exactly alike on everything.
         
4. Policies can be established. It’s helpful for couples to agree on policies before problems begin. Most couples over time develop policies without writing them down. It’s even more helpful to write these policies down. For example, you might agree on a policy that one person’s needs takes precedence over the other person’s wants. This would mean that buying a washing machine comes before purchasing a boat. Or the need for a car takes precedence over new furniture.
         
Another policy might be that the one with the strongest preference makes the decision.  Couples can use a rating scale from 1-10 to tell each other how important a preference is. If one partner is an eight about eating at LaRosa’s and the other is a five for Applebee’s, the eight makes the decision. This works unless the same person always has stronger preferences than the other one.
         
A policy relating to chores might state that the partner who has the time or the partner who is most able will do the job. A related policy would state that the person who is expected to do the work will have the final say on how and when a job is done.
         
Couples might also adopt a policy that when they are away from their partner they can each do, say, and wear whatever they want. When they are together they will not do anything that bothers or embarrasses the other. Couples may also want to adopt policies about the use of money, handling children, in-laws, and their use of time.
         
Some times we can’t reach a decision; we aren’t ready to decide about an issue. Then we can agree to continue talking. Set a time and day to do this. If after several serious attempts to solve the issue you still are at an impasse, counseling can help. Also very helpful are marriage educational groups such as The Third Option and Marriage Enrichment.

“Arrogant know it alls stir up discord, but wise men and women listen to each other’s counsel.” Proverbs 13:10 The Message

You may have to draw straws when faced with a tough decision.” Proverbs 18:18 The Message

Blessings, Dottie


Wednesday, February 8, 2017

Red Words in Scripture

HE WHO OVERCOMES WILL...   
Revelation 2:7 He who has an ear, let him hear what the Spirit says to the churches. To him who overcomes, I will give the right to eat from the tree of life, which is in the paradise of God.

Revelation 2:10 Do not be afraid of what you are about to suffer. I tell you the devil will put some of you in prison to test you and you will suffer persecution for ten days. Be faithful even to the point of death and I will give you the crown of life.

Revelation 2:11 He who has an ear, let him hear what the spirit says to the churches. He who overcomes will not be hurt by the second death.

Revelation 2:17 He who has an ear, let him hear what the spirit says to the churches. To him who overcomes I will give some of the hidden manna. I will also give him a white stone with a new name written on it, known only to him who receives it.         

Revelation 2:26-27 To him who overcomes and does my will to the end, I will give authority over the nations - He will rule them with an iron scepter; he will dash time to pieces like pottery’- just as I received authority. I will also give them the morning star.

Revelation 3:4-5 You have a few people in Sardis who have not soiled their clothes. They will walk with me, dressed in white, for they are worthy. He who overcomes will, like them, be dressed in white. I will never blot out his name from the book of life, but will acknowledge his name before my Father and his angels.

Revelation 3:10 Since you have kept my command to endure patiently 
I will also keep you from the hour of trial that is going to come upon the whole world to test those who live on the earth.      

Revelation 3:12 Him who overcomes I will make a pillar in the temple of my God. Never again will he leave it. I will write on him the name of my God and the name of the city of my God, the new Jerusalem, which is coming down out of heaven from my God; and I will also write on him my new name.

Revelation 3:21 To him who overcomes I will give the right to sit with me on my throne, just as I overcame and sat down with my Father on his throne. 

Revelation 22:14 Blessed are those who wash their robes, that they may have the right to the tree of  life and may go through the gates into the city.

These verses repeat the phrase “He who overcomes.” So who is an overcomer? The good news is that to be an overcomer means to be a Christian. All "born again" Christians are overcomers! This is clear in 1 John 5:4 which says “For whoever is born of God overcomes the world; and this is the victory that has overcome the world – our faith. 

So if we have surrendered our life to Christ and are born again Christians we are overcomers and will inherit all the promises that follow this phrase – to he who overcomes.
  • I will give the right to eat from the tree of life, which is in the paradise of God.
  • I will give you the crown of life 
  • He will not be hurt by the second death.
  • I will give some of the hidden manna. I will also give him a white stone with a new name written on it, known only to him who receives it. 
  • I will give authority over the nations… I will also give them the morning star. 
  • He will be dressed in white. I will never blot out his name from the book of life, but will acknowledge his name before my Father and his angels. 
  • I will also keep you from the hour of trial that is going to come upon the whole world to test those who live on the earth. 
  • I will write on him the name of my God and the name of the city of my God, the new Jerusalem, which is coming down out of heaven from my God; and I will also write on him my new name. 
  • I will give the right to sit with me on my throne, just as I overcame and sat down with my Father on his throne 
  • He will have the right to the tree of life and may go through the gates into the city. 
Father,
Your promises are amazing and grand. We praise you for your love and grace to us who are your true followers. Hold us fast and help us continue to overcome whatever life holds for us before we join you in glory.

Friday, February 3, 2017

Psalm 150

Today I’m posting the Musings of a friend who writes about Psalm 150. Enjoy!

Lessons from Our Grammar Studies
By William F. Powers

Psalm 150:1-6 “Praise ye the LORD. Praise God in his sanctuary: praise him in the firmament of his power. Praise him for his mighty acts: praise him according to his excellent greatness. Praise him with the sound of the trumpet: praise him with the psaltery and harp. Praise him with the timbrel and dance: praise him with stringed instruments and organs. Praise him upon the loud cymbals: praise him upon the high sounding cymbals. Let every thing that hath breath praise the LORD. Praise ye the LORD.”

This is the last of the psalms. Like the four psalms preceding it, Psalm 150 begins with the words “Praise ye the LORD” and ends with the same phrase.

I recently came across this psalm in one of the Bibles I haven’t used in a while. While reading, I saw the notes I had written, and they prompted me to recall one of my school lessons from many years ago. Perhaps you too might recall the five questions to be answered in an announcement: Who, What, Where, When and Why. However, in this psalm, the questions are What, Where, Why, How, and Who.

WHAT? Praise ye the LORD (verse 1).

WHERE? Praise God in his sanctuary: praise him in the firmament of his power (verse 1).

WHY? Praise him for his mighty acts: praise him according to his excellent greatness (verse 2).

HOW? Praise him with the sound of the trumpet: praise him with the psaltery and harp. Praise him with the timbrel and dance: praise him with stringed instruments and organs. Praise him upon the loud cymbals: praise him upon the high sounding cymbals (verses 3-5).

WHO? Let every thing that hath breath praise the LORD (verse 6).

Perhaps verse 6 also answers the question “When.” As long as we have breath in us, we are to praise the Lord.

Oh, and one last thing … Praise ye the LORD!