BEST BOOKS READ IN 2018

Just Mercy: A Story of Justice and Redemption

By Bryan Stevenson                                                   

Just Mercy is a sobering account of a multitude of injustices done against many blacks and poor people by the criminal justice system in the United States. Caution: This book will make you cry and will make you very sad. Yet we need to know about this and do what we can to help correct the many problems. Bryan Stevenson, a lawyer, has built a non-profit organization to represent people wrongfully imprisoned. He has worked tirelessly for decades and has managed to save hundreds from life in prison. The most unbelievable injustice includes children as young as thirteen being put in solitary confinement for life! Stevenson’s writes with warmth, kindness and intense emotion. This is a powerful book.

God and the Transgender Debate: What Does the Bible Actually Say About Gender Identity?

By Andrew T. Walker

God and the Transgender Debate is a ground breaking book! Andrew Walker lovingly and thoughtfully describes the issues, problems and caring solutions for helping people struggling with gender identity. He spells out the fact that we must love every person as Jesus did. We must listen to them to understand their struggle. We must accept them and learn from them. We must also help them understand that we are all sinners, we are all created in the image of God, and we are all created as either male or female.

Should feelings about who I am trump what my body says about who I am? Walker tells about a white man in his thirties who interviews college students and asks them what they would say if he said he is woman? What if he said he was Chinese? What if he said he was seven years old and wanted to enroll in first grade? What would they say if he said he was 6 ft 5” tall? (10 inches taller than his actual height.) None of the students would say he was wrong. They said it was OK for him to view himself as very tall, or Chinese, or a woman.

Walker gives a wealth of information. A chapter on how to talk with children about this issue is excellent, loving and helpful. He also has a chapter in which he answers questions and a chapter on how the church must lovingly deal with this issue. I hope many will read this book and learn from it. I hope parents with children facing this culture in their schools will read this book. Walker offers valuable information and insights along with loving kindness, grace and truth. Here’s the link for You Tube “College Kids Say the Darndest Things.” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-4S0gHlKiho

Little Soldiers: An American Boy, a Chinese School, and the Global Race to Achieve

By Lenora Chu                                                                                

Little Soldiers is an excellent, detailed book about the educational system in China. Lenora Chu, an American journalist and her husband move to Shanghai to live. Chu’s parents had emigrated from China and she was an American citizen born and raised in Texas. Her husband was a blond American with Norwegian roots. He worked in China with the Peace Corp for some years as a young man and was eager to return there. They settled in Shanghai both with jobs there. When their son, Rainey, was three they enrolled him in a Chinese school. Rainey was a rambunctious toddler. The school was very authoritarian. Toddlers were held captive in small chairs and punished or even banished if they didn’t obey every order.

Chu writes in depth about their experiences with Rainey and how he adapted. Chu had many misgivings and uncertainties about continuing Rainey in the system. Over a period of several years she details their journey and she goes on a quest to understand the effects of a Chinese education on children. She befriends Chinese students in their teens and in college who share their ideas about education. She visits Chinese schools out in the country where poverty and poor teaching prevail.

She describes the extreme pressure on the children and on their parents regarding home work and testing. This becomes more extreme as they approach the higher grades. She ultimately decides that the early years of Chinese education with memorization, high expectations and very hard work produces more intelligent children who then can reason effectively and still be creative in what they do.

This is an excellent and thorough exploration of the Chinese educational system. Parents, grandparents, educators and all who value learning should read this and be informed. Hopefully the information here will influence the American schools to expect more from young children.          

          

Educated: A Memoir

By Tara Westover

Educated is an amazing memoir of the author’s life growing up with an abusive, disturbed, fanatic father and a disturbed brother. She is the youngest of seven children, five of them boys. She grew up in the mountains of Idaho and received no formal schooling.The family avoided all medical treatment, using natural remedies even for serious injuries. The book is disturbing, going from one accident or injury to another. The family dynamics are shocking and unbelievable. 

Tara, tough and strong, worked with the men and boys through her childhood as well as with her mother concocting various health remedies or learning to be a midwife. When seventeen she left the family against her father’s will and enrolled at Brigham Young University. This transition was not easy. Nor was it easy for her to come to terms with her past. She has a list of degrees including a PhD in history from Cambridge. As an adult she struggled with how to stay connected to her family without being sucked back into the morass.

I couldn’t put this book down. I read it in two days. This book is disturbing. It is also a New York Times best seller.

Blessings, Dottie

Parent Advice: I.Q. and Emotional Intelligence

Q. I’m concerned about educating my children so they will be smart enough to do well in today’s world. A friend disagrees with me about the importance of I.Q. in predicting who will do well in life. How important is I.Q. in determining success? What characteristics lead to achievement in life? Can these traits be learned or are they fixed at birth or early in childhood?

A. In recent decades parents have been urged to teach and stimulate their infants and children from a young age. Flash cards, educational toys, playing classical music and providing lots of attention to infants is used with the expectation this will increase a child’s I.Q. and assure a child’s success in life.

While early education and stimulation may increase I.Q. slightly and infants and children do flourish with attention, new research indicates that I.Q is not the most important factor leading to health, happiness, and achievement. I.Q. is now believed to contribute only 20 percent to a person’s life success.

“Emotional intelligence” is now touted as more essential to success than I.Q. This concept is described and a wealth of research explored in Emotional Intelligence by Daniel Goleman. The term “emotional intelligence” includes characteristics like self-awareness, impulse control, persistence, self-motivation, empathy for others and hope. 

         

People with “emotional intelligence” are able to motivate themselves and they persist in completing tasks even when they face frustrations. They are able to delay gratification and to regulate their moods. They are able to think even in emotion packed situations. They also are optimistic about themselves and about life. These are the characteristics that successful individuals possess.

These skills lead to happier relationships, increased physical health and greater career success. They also correlate with lower incidences of delinquency and drug use in children. Goleman says that children who improve their emotional skills also do better on achievement tests.

         

A key to “emotional intelligence” is being able to recognize your emotions. Someone who has a bad day may arrive home in an irritable mood and lash out at others without knowing why. When we’re able to recognize our feelings we’re able to use reason to decide how we will handle ourselves. We can control our emotions rather than being controlled by them. Self awareness enables us to use self control without repressing our emotions.

         

Another significant trait Goleman explores is optimism. Research shows when optimists fail at something they view the failure as temporary and attribute it to something they can change rather than to some lack in themselves impossible to overcome. In contrast, pessimists view failure as permanent and blame themselves.

Another trait of major importance is empathy or the ability to recognize the feelings of others. Goleman tells of a think tank for engineers where the top performers were not the ones with the highest I.Q.s, but those who were popular and good at collaborating with their co-workers. These are the people who got promoted.

         

The recognition that “emotional intelligence” is more important than I.Q. is good news. These traits can be learned whereas I.Q. is relatively fixed from a young age. We can increase our “emotional intelligence” throughout life!    

How can we teach our children “emotional intelligence”? Children learn from our behavior as well as from our words. If we model emotional intelligence they will learn this from us. We must understand that their growth toward maturity is a slow process.  We must be patient and accept their immaturity while applauding each sign that they are becoming more emotionally mature. We need to be realistic about their abilities or lacks but also optimistic and loving about them also. Our optimism greatly affects their belief in themselves.

Dr. Goleman doesn’t address “spiritual intelligence”. I dare say that a child who grows up in a loving church and develops a strong faith in God and His Word will be even more mature, intelligent and optimistic.

“The unfolding of your words gives light; it gives understanding to the simple.” Psalm 119:130

Blessings, Dottie